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Why would I buy Valco instead of Beats?

Updated

Symptom

The user has seen too many ads where celebrities pose with headphones on, and nobody ever actually listens to music with them.


Quick Fix

Ask yourself: do I want headphones, or a status symbol? If it's the latter, buy a Gucci bag instead. It'll hold up better than the Beats will.

Why would I buy Valco instead of Beats?

Good question. Well, actually it's more of an obvious question, but let's go through it anyway.

Short answer

Beats are a fashion accessory that happens to play sound. Valco is a headphone that happens to look good. The difference is the same as between a restaurant where the food is great and a restaurant where the decor is great and the food tastes like microwave lasagna.

Longer answer

Beats by Dre was born when a rapper and a headphone engineer, or really a rapper and Apple's marketing department, decided that bass is the only frequency that matters. The result is a headphone that plays pretty much all music like you're standing in a nightclub bathroom. This is cool for about 15 minutes.

Valco's headphones were tuned by Jasse, who has spent more time with frequency response curves than you've spent scrolling Netflix. And that's saying a lot. In practice this means you hear details in music you didn't know existed. The drummer's breathing. The guitarist's fingers sliding on the strings. The singer's regret about signing that record deal.

But what about the brand?

Beats cost what they cost because about 40% of that price is the logo. With Valco, you pay roughly 0% for the logo, because we spent about half an hour and one beer designing it. The money goes into sound quality and the Death Star construction fund.

Repairability

Here's the actual technical fact: the Beats battery is glued in, and replacing it basically means destroying the device. With Valco headphones, you swap the ear pads yourself by hand, and our service team handles the rest. When Beats break, you buy new ones. When Valco breaks, Hannes and the guys fix it in Kajaani for a flat 69 euros and mail it back.

Summary

| | Valco | Beats |

|---|---|---|

| Sound quality | Yes | Bass go brrrr |

| Repairability | Yes | No |

| Celebrity endorsements | Can't afford them | LeBron James |

| Funds the Death Star | Yes | No |

If you want headphones to listen to music with, buy Valco. If you want headphones to pose with in Instagram photos, buy Beats. We don't judge. But we judge a little.

Still stuck?

We get it — technology should just work. If these steps didn't help, our support team is ready. Include the following when reaching out:

  • Your product model and firmware version
  • A description of the issue
  • Steps you've already tried from this article

Small disclosure: we're a tiny company and none of us has time to hand-write all these articles, so they were generated by AI. Some of it is bound to be total crap. If this article is wrong, misleading, or just bad, flag it for us — we go through the flagged ones and either fix them or kill them.

Valco VMK25.2 premium ANC headphones

VMK25.2

€199.00In stock

VMK25.2 on vastalause nykyteknologialle: näissä kuulokkeissa ei ole tekoälyä, sykemittareita tai raivostuttavia hipaisukytkimiä. Olemme keskittyneet vain pyhään kolminaisuuteen: studiotason äänenlaatuun, täydelliseen istuvuuteen ja massiiviseen akunkestoon. Vaikka ulkokuori on tuttu ja turvallinen, uusi teknologia pellin alla tekee tästä kiistatta parhaan kuulokkeemme. Valco on valinta sinulle, joka haluat kuunnella musiikkia, etkä säätää asetuksia.

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